Woody Allen

I got such a good laugh out of these.. humor, wisdom and sarcasm combined - brilliant!

To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.

When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.

Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?

You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.

His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.

I am at two with nature.

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam;
I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

I have bad reflexes. I was once run over by a car being pushed by two guys.

I'd never join a club that would allow a person like me to become a member.

I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.

If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative.

In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.

Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply,' but not in those words.

Woody Allen

Born on December 1st 1935.
Birth name:
Allen Stewart Königsberg

For some reason I'm more appreciated in France than I am back home.
The subtitles must be incredibly good.

..and here are a couple of Woody Allen video clips

Ego Dialogues

Woody Allen