Cool One-liners

I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.

Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.

Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he isn't there the first time you need him, chances are you won't be needing him again.
Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, "Where the heck is the ceiling?!"

Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level and then they beat you with experience.

Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.
He who laughs last thinks slowest.

Time is what keeps everything from happening at once.

Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

The face of a child can say it all....especially the mouth part of the face.

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

It's been lovely but I have to scream now.

Don't give me that attitude - I've got my own.

Keep staring....I may do a trick.

I have checked the synonyms for "cool", as the title "Cool One-liners" sounds kind of goofy.

I am going to disregard those referring to the word "cool" in its other meanings (e.g. cold, calm, etc.) and concentrate only on the following:

Main Entry: cool (adjective)
Definition: excellent
Synonyms: dandy, divine, glorious, groovy, hunky-dory*, keen, marvelous, neat, nifty, sensational, swell

So...

Dandy One-liners
Divine One-liners
Glorious One-liners

Shall I go on?

I suppose "Groovy One-liners" sounds kind of sensational and hunky-dory, but would "Keen One-Liners" sound equally swell?

Ego Dialogues

Cool One-liners